On another note though my anxiety is steadily rising as Wednesday approaches. I’m going to Chicago with my 6 month old daughter alone. Without her father and I’m not only nervous but scared of being in the airport alone and being on the plane alone and having to … Parent I guess lol. I’m so used to always either being taken care of or taking care of sage in environments I’m entirely comfortable in. This is out of my element completely unnatural to me. 

I’m terrified but I’m also excited because if (and parts of me knows I can) I can do this and not hyperventilate or fuck some shit up then this solo parent trip will give me so much confidence in myself. As a parent, as a mother as a newly 24 year old lol, adding more responsibility to myself. Saying look if I can do this then I can do this and this too. 

Like this trip is seriously going to be so affirming if I can do it. 


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